The World Revolves Around $

And I hate that.

We dish out thousands of dollars, to go to school, to get an education, to graduate, to go to college, to earn a degree, and to go out into the world and make more money so we can pay it out in sweat, tears, arms and limbs back to the government so that they can fund all the other crap going on around the world. There's life in a nutshell. Live, pay taxes, and die.

Basically, we spend a ton of money to take a few classes, pass a few courses, and earn our degree in whatever field we're going into. You can pass with a D average. That means that just about ANYONE could get a degree if they have the money to. So who says that some guy with a D-average from some prestigeous school isn't performing brain surgery right now? Whos to say our technicians aren't all slobs who just happened to come from rich families? I'm over exaggerating a bit here... My point is that my only motivation right now in college is to keep scholarships I have. I have to get a 3.0 atleast to get about $1500 a year. Right now, I think I have about a 2.8 gpa. Honestly, I don't really care. I'm working pretty hard. I'll admit it's not my best. But I have a job. I have a social life. So I don't want to spend all my free time working on a research paper that counts for 1/4 of my grade. Sue me. I don't know... maybe I'm stressing over things that don't really matter much... And I think that's what's getting to me, really. I'm tired of stressing about things. I want to live! lol

Money isn't exactly a great motivation factor for me. I don't care much about it. If I want something, I'm gonna just buy it and worry about it later. I'm not a stupid shopper. I don't indulge in everything that I want. I don't just go on shopping sprees and spend hundreds of dollars. The most i'll get is like a new pair of shoes, or a few new cds or something like that. That's it. But in terms of like scholarships, I feel like I'll end up paying it all back to my parents anyway, and I'll hopefully make enough in my career that later on, it won't really matter. Because honestly, I don't think it will matter.

Bottom line, I don't want money to rule my life. I don't want to worry about it all the time. I don't want it to be something that hangs over my head any time I use a credit card (which I actually still don't have). Other than that... I'm just stressing about school and the fact that my parents are going to be pretty pisssed off at me when they find out that I'm losing this scholarship that I didn't even apply for... my dad did. :-P I'll just give them $1500. I started paying for gas now too, because I got tired of my parents complaining about money. That's what I DONT like. It's what I dont want to hear. So I thought I'd ease that burden off their hands and put it into mine. I guess I have to get used to it anyway.

I can't wait to move out and live out my career... whatever and where ever that actually means... Who knows.

I hate money.

A Tiny Annoyance

There's this girl in my Sociology class... she seems innocent enough. She even looks innocent enough.

I take with great respect the use of a hi-liter. They're convenient for pointing out or making clear to you something that may be important. It may be some key aspect in something you're doing.

This girl...let me tell you. She had it all wrong, ok? lol She abused the right to having or using a hi-liter. She used it for her planner. Not just hi-liting key events, or important days, no... she didn't stop there. She would take the thing and hi-lite the whole bloody paper! What is the point??

I dont know.. that got on my nerves. Who uses a hi-liter to hi-lite an entire page in a planner? It would be one thing if she did it to just one. Maybe that was some BIG day for her. No... she hi-lited EVERY SINGLE DAY!

Retarded. And a waste of perfectly good hi-liting ink. Whatever...

Recording: Take Me Somewhere

So today I wrote a song: Take Me Somewhere. I recorded it today too. It sounds pretty good except for a few parts that are choppy, and not in time... but other than that I'm pretty happy with the way that it turned out.

You can check it out at www.myspace.com/abbyfisher

Or you can just read about it... your choice.

Anyway... writing it was the easy part. Recording was the part that really tripped me up. I programmed all the drums and guitar parts myself, because I can't actually do that kind of thing myself. :-P

To put in the snare part, I had to hit the "d" button on my keyboard really fast. And then to get everything in time, and make it sound decent... it's a lot harder than it all sounds.

But anyway, I'm pretty happy with the outcome, so you really should check it out if you're interested. I might start recording more solo material more often, but we'll see... I may just have that be material for my band, "The End All." Who knows...

Have a nice day.

One more update:

I decided to re-do my room. It kind of started with the mural, but now I want everything to go with it. My dresser is ancient. I want a new one entirely. I'm getting a new bed - hopefully a bigger one. Maybe i'll get one with the drawers underneath to save space. And then I want to re-paint the other walls to go with the mural. Purple and flowery doesn't exactly match punk-rock ataris wall. haha

I want to re-do the interior of my closet. Maybe find another place for my cds. They aren't all fitting on the shelf in the closet... who knows what's happening in there. haha

I've always wanted hardwood floors... my dad says that isn't happening.

I def need a bookshelf.

I guess as I come up with more ideas i'll put them into effect... for now it's basically an unstructured mess in progress. :-P

As soon as I finish (if I ever do) I will take pictures and post them here.

Until then, wish me luck in my endeavours.

:-D

Have a nice day.

Random Updates

*Bryan's dinner was delicious - he made pork, asparagus, sweet potatoes, and spiced cinnamon apple slices. It was amazing. Dessert was strawberry cheesecake

*I dont know where I'd be without my friends. You know who you are.

*I wrote and recorded a new song. It's pretty cool. Ask about it.

*The "I" on my keyboard keeps getting stuck. It's bothersome

*I'm basically failing statistics

*I found out how fireworks work

*I looked up the meaning to imaginary numbers. I still say they're a load of crap.

*School is stupid when you have stupid teachers. ((cough cough)) ENGLISH!!! ((cough cough))

*I've been buying cds left and right now that I found my list, and re-did it. :-P I need to chill out.

*I might get fired soon, but I'm not sure yet. Although, I'm not so sure I'd have a problem with that. ;-)

*Summer vacation is fast approaching.

*Seeing Hot Rod Circuit May 3rd. Excitement to the 10th power.

*I'm pretty comfortable with everything right now. It's a happy thing. :-)

*I don't care about money.

*I don't want to be "old" old. The idea is pretty weird.

*Oldies music rocks my world.

*My cat is a bum who takes over my pillow in the middle of the night. >:-(

*I love cheesecake. But not strawberries.

*I need to get with my band and record soon!!! (i.e. The End All - it's just me and Adam. :-P)

*Text messages make my day.

*Sleeping is good. I've taken a nap about every day this week and last week. I feel so refreshed.

*Good weather makes for good days.

*Rainy days are nice (in spring)

*Making out in the rain sounds even nicer. lol - Doesn't everyone have some kind of fantasy about that?

*I want to go to the ocean.

*Life is good. Give me a call

Demitri Martin: Episode 3

A Dinnero por my familio

I'm not really that bad at Spanish. haha I took it for 3 years after all. But anyway, Hannah boyfriend Bryan is making my family dinner tonight, and I hear he's quite the chef. That said I'm excited about it. Especially since I'll actually be there for it. I don't work today. What a shocker. Haha

Anyway, I'm interested to see what he makes. No, he isn't Mexican. He's Philipino. But I think I heard something about him making mexican food. Not sure though. Oh well. We'll see. I'm sure it'll be delicious. Mmmmmm delicioso!!!!

Cooking 102

Turns out I'm not so great at making pretzels...

Oh well. Maybe I'll try again next time I'm in the mood.

I think maybe I just added too much baking soda. That would do it.

Cooking 101

My best friend Adam went to Ruutz today. I think that's how you spell it? Anyway... it's in PA. This Amish market where people sell things and whatnot. Good times. I love going there.

His venture there today inspired me to make one thing that makes those trips always stand out for me: ham and cheese pretzels. They're heavenly good. I'm sure the ones I'm making won't be nearly as delicious, but they're just a nice reminder of what I love about the Amish market, and PA for that matter. The food!

But anyway...I'm making a pretty big mess, but I'm hoping the outcome will be worth all of it.

Mmmm can't wait.

I really do enjoy cooking, but I generally have to be in the mood to. And I enjoy a challenge. ;-)

Now reading the Eulogy of...

The Track Record.

You were a good band. I only got to see you twice...but both times you were amazing.

So yeah...I just found out that the track record broke up. Way to ruin my day. And the rest of my bloody life for that matter. No, I'm joking. But it will certainly remain a let down for a while.

My favorite song would have to be "Letters to Summer" and "Available/Responsible." The lyrics were so catchy, and they kinda meant something to me. More or less.

Here are a few lyrics by who other than the track record themselves:

"The place at which we want to be is well within our reach...we're just not ready for it"

"This hardly scratches the surface, I make it a point to leave you wanting more."

So here's to the track record. They left me wanting more. Go buy their album.

Cheers

Demitri Martin Episode 2

Thursday morning

I decided at 3am on Thursday morning to drive to the beach and watch the sunrise. A bit risky to go by myself, but I wasn't worried at all. Plus this is March. There aren't going to be a ton of people down there. But it was nice. The drive was quiet. I had made a mix that consisted of 4 cds with about 21 tracks on each one just for the ride. It was perfect. Relaxing. I only wish I could have stayed longer than I did.

So I just went up there for the day, took a small nap and headed home around 1pm. I just drove around, sat on the beach, took pictures, and cruised. It was overall a nice experience because I like being by myself like that. It's awesome. It probably would have been nicer, and safer, to have gone with someone else... but no one could... and my spring break wasn't getting any longer. Plus it was such perfect weather!

But anyway, here's some of the pics I took there:







That isn't all of them, just my favorites. The first one is probably the best picture I've ever taken in my opinion. :-) Hope you enjoyed them.

Ewww Gay

So on my way home from work tonight, I was driving down the road. Totally obeying the speed limit. The light turns yellow so I speed up to get out of the intersection, when all of a sudden, this idiot driver in front of me just beyond the light decides they don't know whether they're turning left, or right at this next light and instead of figuring it out while they were driving onward, they stopped dead in the middle of the road!

I slam on the breaks and barely avoid contact with this jerks car and they finally put on a blinker, and start up again to turn right.

Having to slam the breaks to hard, I ended up getting a charlie horse in my right calf muscle, which hurt like hell the entire way home... and I got a cramp in my other foot from the stress of the scene.

Idiot drivers bug the hell out of me. So do charlie horses.

I'm not having fun right now... Advil time.

"Spring Bum Out" is more like it

I really really hate that no one has the same break as me. I can't do anything!!! I want to go to the BEACH! I want to get outta here! lol

It must just be the season....

I have the break, but not the fun part of it. :-P

Somebody help me out here!

Snap Crackle and Pop!

No, not the cereal.

Cracking your fingers, and whatever else in your body has become a pretty big debate in my house hold, and amongst most of the people I know. My mom is convinced that it causes arthritis, and other people say there's no connection. So, being a knuckle-cracker I decided to look it up.

Here's the article I read - just if you're interested to know what it actually does and whether or not it's actually harmful:

"Joints are the meeting points of two separate bones, held together and in place by connective tissues and ligaments. All of the joints in our bodies are surrounded by synovial fluid, a thick, clear liquid. When you stretch or bend your finger to pop the knuckle, you are causing the bones of the joint to pull apart. As they do, the connective tissue capsule that surrounds the joint is stretched. By stretching this capsule, you increase its volume. And as we know from chemistry class, with an increase in volume comes a decrease in pressure. So as the pressure of the synovial fluid drops, gases dissolved in the fluid become less soluble, forming bubbles through a process called cavitation. When the joint is stretched far enough, the pressure in the capsule drops so low that these bubbles burst, producing the pop that we associate with knuckle cracking.

"It takes about 25-30 minutes for the gas to redissolve into the joint fluid. During this period of time, your knuckles will not crack. Once the gas is redissolved, cavitation is once again possible, and you can start popping your knuckles again.

"As for the harms associated with this habit, according to Anatomy and Physiology Instructors' Cooperative, only one in-depth study regarding the possible detriments of knuckle popping has been published. This study, done by Raymond Brodeur and published in the Journal of Manipulative and Physiological Therapeutics, examined 300 knuckle crackers for evidence of joint damage. The results revealed no apparent connection between joint cracking and arthritis; however, habitual knuckle poppers did show signs of other types of damage, including soft tissue damage to the joint capsule and a decrease in grip strength. This damage is most likely a result of the rapid, repeated stretching of the ligaments surrounding the joint. A professional baseball pitcher experiences similar, although obviously heightened, effects in the various joints of his pitching arm. But assuming you haven't signed a multimillion dollar contract to constantly pop your knuckles, it hardly seems worth the possible risk to your joints.

"On the positive side, there is evidence of increased mobility in joints right after popping. When joints are manipulated, the Golgi tendon organs (a set of nerve endings involved in humans' motion sense) are stimulated and the muscles surrounding the joint are relaxed. This is part of the reason why people can feel "loose" and invigorated after leaving the chiropractor's office, where cavitation is induced as part of the treatment. Backs, knees, elbows and all other movable joints are subject to the same kind manipulation as knuckles are." - From the article "What Makes your Knuckles Pop?" at www.howstuffworks.com/question437.htm


So maybe you just learned something, or maybe this was stuff you already knew. But it makes me feel a lot better about cracking my knuckles from time to time.

Things I like

I don't think I'm into any specific type of guy. All the guys I've liked in the past have ranged from religious, to punk rockers, to skate boarders, to stoners. Except that when I found out the one guy was a stoner I stopped liking him. haha That said I don't know that there's any specific personality that i like. It's more or less what they do and don't do that matters to me. All the rest doesn't really mean much. So here's a list of things that I think I like, or that I'm attracted to. Usually I don't like making lists like this, because I don't want people to model themselves after it just so that I'm impressed, you know? But so far I haven't had that be a problem. ha

So here goes nothin:

1. Cologne - in moderation. I like it when a guy smells clean. If you wear cologne, don't make it because you're covering up a "bad smell." Make it because you're accenting your already fresh scent and want others to take notice in a good way. From my standing on cologne, less is MORE. (Curve is nice. I almost bought it so that I could smell like that because I loved it so much. but I didn't. Thought it would be a little awkward. haha)

2. Clothes - I don't really care what style you prefer, but I like it when your clothes fit you. Too tight isn't good unless you look good in tight clothing. If that is the case, the tighter the better. haha jk. Too tight is never good. But I like clothes to fit. Baggy just looks tacky and lazy.

3. Gentlemen - I really appreciate kind gestures by guys. I always notice them too. Holding open doors, paying for movies, pulling out chairs, etc. That's not to say that I'm going to expect it all the time, or that I'm going to harp on you for not doing those things. But I will always think in my head, "Aw how sweet" after you do it. I do that kind of thing for other people too, so I won't be selfish and make you always pay, or make you do things for me. It's just something I like. I won't look for it, or expect it though. Just know that I notice kind gestures. :-)

4. Smiles - I really like when I'm talking to someone, and they smile. Or they keep eye contact with me. It makes me feel really comfortable and like I know you want to be there talking with me. If you're looking off somewhere else, or have your arms crossed and you don't seem interested, I'm going to think that I'm not worth your time. Then I make myself feel bad. That doesn't mean you have to pay attention to me all the time. It just means that if I'm talking to you, I don't want to think you aren't listening.

5. When I know they're thinking about me - this could mean basically anything. Just anything that says, "Hey I was thinking about you" is going to make me really excited and happy about it. Be creative. I always am, and I always try to do this kind of thing without over stepping boundaries or making anything seem like "too much."

6. Taste in music - anyone that I'm interested in now has to have good taste in music. It doesn't matter what for the most part, just as long as we share interests in that subject. I like arguing over specifics when it comes to music because I've acquired a pretty good opinion when it comes to what "good music" is. So if we have differences, it's not to say I won't appreciate or get used to them. Just be prepared for a little argument here and there.

7. Flirting - I'll never be the first to flirt. That is with anything. In conversation, in physical contact, I don't know whatever else.. But there's something about me where I can never bring myself to just come out and say or do something. Just know I'll want you to. In moderation though. Don't take away the fun of it by doing it ALL the time. Here and there is good. I'm ticklish everywhere so don't take advantage of that too often. lol Just as long as I can get you back for it.

8. Religious view - I'm a Christian. I don't think everyone I'm interested should have to be. I want you to have an opinion on God though. Anything. I won't try to change your mind, or convert you, but I want you to respect the fact that I do have faith in God. Thanks.

9. Sense of humor - I like when guys are funny. I love laughing. You don't have to be a comedian, but I need you to atleast have enough of a sense of humor that if we're watching a funny movie, you can laugh at stupid things, or laugh at yourself when you do something stupid, or laugh at things I say and do that are funny so that I can laugh with you. I don't need someone to be serious all the time. Just know when to be, and when to loosen up.

10. Height - I want someone who's taller than me. Not saying I couldn't fall for someone shorter, but it's my general rule of thumb that he's gotta be taller than me.

11. Hair - length doesn't matter to me. As long as it looks good on you.

12. Animals - they have to like cats, or be able to deal with them if they don't. I can deal with dogs, but I dont like them and they scare me most of the time.

13. Artistic/creative - if you're neither of these things, you need to have atleast some kind of appreciation for it. I would love it though if you have some kind of creative disposition or the ability to see things in different ways. It'll give us a lot to talk about.

14. Hobbies - have some. Convo topics. Common interests. Uncommon interests. Anything. I just want to know that there are things you do besides eating and sleeping.

15. Intelligent - I dated a guy who thought I used big words when I said "intellect" and "ambiguous." I'm glad though because atleast I knew he was an idiot after that. I don't think they need to be a genius, but they definitely need to be atleast to my level or more intelligent than I am. Hopefully more though. There are a lot of things I don't understand. And I'm pretty naiive.

16. Timing - Never be late. Have a reason if you are. I'm always on time, or early. More than likely early. But I always have a reason if I'm late.

17. Honest - Don't lie to me. If you do, then make it for something that wouldn't matter either way, or that I really don't need to know the truth about. Just be honest. Be open too. Confide in me for things. I'm not a gossip. I like to know that you can trust me with information, and it would make me a lot more comfortable to share the less comfortable things in my life with you.

18. Literate - be somewhat literate, or read books of some kind. lol

19. Shy - I like shy guys. Don't be too shy though. We'll probably never talk. haha I'm pretty shy myself, so I like being able to relate with that. It makes me less uncomfortable about guys if they're feeling the way I am.

20. Dating - it doesn't have to mean eternity from day one. It can be comfortable. Casual. Just don't expect me to spend all of my time with you, or want to. You have your friends, I'll have mine, and we can have in betweens. You can cancel plans with me to hang out with a friend you haven't seen in forever and a day. I'll understand. I'm not selfish and I'm extremely patient. Just don't be clingy or cancel on me every time I try to hang out with or go out with you. My ex was clingy. Hence "ex." haha So you don't have to call EVERY night, and we don't have to go out EVERY weekend. Just save room for me on occasion. That's what dating should be.

So those are just a few things. Always open for interpretation and changes. Whatever. There's no set rules for me when it comes to what I look for, so that could always fluxuate. That and I haven't really dated much, so it's not like I could have a really strong opinion about it. haha

Demitri Martin Stand-Up

This guy is so hilarious. He's awesome. :-)

Walking, Talking, Fortune Cookie

Okay so this Asian woman comes into my work the other day... this is not the start of a poorly-constructed racist joke. So she comes in an asks me for my help:

Woman: "Ca yu help meh?"

Me: "Of course."

Woman: "Oh tan yu. Yu soah kind."

Literally. This lady reeked Asian. Stereotypical mirror image of one. I almost thought she'd have fortune cookies in her purse or something. She did have one of those little change purses though. In which she had over $500.00 cash. She paid me in all pennies. Yes I'm exaggerating. But she did drop a penny under some of the racks and had me go get it for her.

Woman: "Eh wa a beeeg one! I sure! I sure!"

Me: "Oh it was just a penny."

Woman: "Oh, bu i's so shaaanny!"

This was our actual conversation.

As I was ringing her up, she looked at me and said:

Woman: "Yu so yung. Yu do greeea tings. Greaaaa tings! Yu so yung. So yung."

Me: Oh, thanks. I hope so.

Woman: "Yu go tu school?"

Me: "Yeah, I'm a freshman at Villa Julie."

Woman: "OH! GREAAA TINGS!!!"

Me: "We'll see."

Woman: "Wa chu doin hea? You beta dan dis."

Me: "Well, this was my first job...so I'm just seeing where it takes me."

Woman: "Greaaa tings!"

Me: "Hope so. Have a nice day."


I swear. This woman was sooo Asian. lol I'm not racist. I just found it pretty funny. She was like a fortune teller or something. lol I thought she was gonna teach me some ancient secret before she left. Who knows...maybe she did.

The End All

So my band (me and my friend Adam) should start recording again this week. I'm excited. We have a myspace.

www.myspace.com/th3endall

We're called "The End All" - we might just be your cup of TEA. lol

But I'm really happy with the stuff we've done so far. We have a lot of songs, but haven't gotten around to recording a lot of them since we both get pretty irritable with eachother and end up wanting to murder one another after about an hour of recording. haha I wouldn't go that far, but it definitely gets frustrating.


Adam: Lets record this section again, I think it could be a little tighter

Me: Are you serious? It totally sounds fine.

Adam: No. It doesn't. It sucks.

Me: No. It doesn't. You suck.

Adam: Yeah well $@#* you!

Me: Fine. I'm not your friend anymore.

Adam: Yeah, well I'm not in your band anymore!

Me: What? No! (Starts crying)

Adam: You're right...we're too amazing to break up.

Me: Phew. I'm still not your friend.

Adam: Whatev.

Me: Yeah. You're totally crying on the inside.

Adam: Yeah. I totally am.


As long as we're both unarmed, it can be as tame as that. lol Nah, that was hypothetical. I'm joking. But yeah, it gets frustrating. Especially when neither of us are experts. We need to hire professionals or something. Maybe give them the music and have other people record it for us, and then we'll say it's us. lol

Keep checking for new songs though. But they may not be up for a while. It took about a week to finish one song. :-P

Spring Break: Part 2

So this week is my spring break. I need something to do. Somewhere to go. Anything. However, the problem in all of this is that all of my friends and everyone that I'd want to spend time with has spring break NEXT week, or the week after... that bummed me out.

So if anyone is free THIS week, and wants to do something, go somewhere, anything, give me a call.

-Abby

NHS ceremony

So on Tuesday night I performed at the induction ceremony at North County High School because my sister Hannah (secretary in NHS) was head of entertainment. That said, she coaxed me into performing something that night. Well no, she basically just told me that I was "going to do it." lol

I picked a song for it the day before. "Heart of Life" by John Mayer. It seemed uplifting enough, and the jumpy piano part that I interpreted from the guitar parts in the song were very cute. My problem in the whole thing though was playing the piano part and singing it at the same time. Without any nerves at all, I could do the whole thing beginning to end, singing my heart out (pun intended), and do a decent job with it. That night was a different story though.

I get up there to play, and my hands start shaking. I tried to kind of ease myself out of it, but it didn't work. I was totally psyched out and kept thinking, "Oh my god, I didn't reherse enough...I'm gonna mess this up so bad..." It started well. I was pretty on for the most part, until the chorus. After the first chorus I started screwing up chords, and getting myself frustrated. I kept cool though. Maintained a level of decensy, and kind of redeemed myself at the last chorus and the ending was dead on. I just got wrapped up in a low confidence level and let myself think that I couldn't pull it off.

Afterward people said they didn't notice any flaws when I brought them up after compliments. I guess I shouldn't draw attention to them at all, but I'm pretty modest. Or I try to be. I know I'm good at it, but that night just wasn't my night. I wasn't prepared enough. But it was all right...

I did have one of the parents come up to me and say that I had good taste. At first I was confused and said, "I'm sorry?" He was referring to my handbag that had the "Beatles" on it, and reitterated that I had "good taste in music." When he found out that I made the bag, he was like, "wow, good taste, and talented. that's awesome." So I felt a lot better after that. ;-)

So it wasn't the greatest night, and it wasn't the best performance from me, but atleast I know I have good taste. :-D

Girls can be so selfish sometimes....

Let me clarify.

You always see people making lists of all the things that "guys should do" to make a girl happy. Where's the guys list though? I bet if any guy ever made one, a girl would say, "oh that's just rediculous" and tear it up. Not really like that. But you never see it from their side. You know?

I just see a ton of bulletins and stuff on myspace and blogs that say they want their guy to "hold them, kiss them, tell them all the stuff they want to hear, be considerate, do this, do that..." Sounds pretty bossy to me, dont you think? They'll hold you when they want to. Why not hold them for a change?

Sometimes I find myself waiting for this kind of thing to happen, but only because I'm shy. I don't want a negative reaction. When I think I'm getting one, I back off. I'm really self-conscious, so if I think something is a bad idea, or I think it would be too bold of me, I won't do it. Even if in my mind it's like, "oh come on, this won't get a negative reaction." I'm so weird. lol

Ever see the Village? I'm like the guy on there who won't touch the woman he likes because he likes her. I don't know what it's about, but I'm like that. It's what says I like a person if I'm scared to touch them. However, that doesn't mean that I don't want to. At all.

But the thing I'm getting at is that girls need to be a little more considerate of what guys like instead of stressing upon them all the things they want their guys to do for them. Like what if they want you to give them flowers and candy? lol Maybe not, but just a consideration. I think occasionally the girl should pay for the movie. The girl should put her arm around the guys shoulder. I'm being a hypocrite, because I shy away from doing this kind of thing too... But I'm just saying. Maybe girls should stop being so selfish about "their needs" and look at things in a different light. So you want him to make the first move, huh? Well what if you did for a change? I can't make first moves...it's something I think is definitely a guys job. That's what I get for watching so many romance movies when I was younger I guess... lol

I think all this is why I love this movie:

The girl makes the first move. Technically she doesn't though....you gotta watch the movie. :-P

Yeah...that's about it. Have a nice day.

Random thoughts and questions

Do you ever wonder why we care about all those people in Hollywood? Like, who made them famous? Who's the top of all that? Where's the "industry" come in? I know there are explanations, but how come those people aren't the "famous ones"? I don't know. I'm thinking just randomly. Like, who cares that so-and-so got a boob job, or that whats-her-face shaved her head bald? Why do we need to keep up with all their lives when it's so hard to keep track of your own? I'm not saying that we're all completely obsessed, but it makes me wonder what they think when they see their faces plastered on the headlines and in magazines. How come no one wants to interview "the real people" in the "real world" on TV? Again just random thoughts. Don't take me too seriously on all this. I know a lot of people are famous because they are "talented" but that's so loose these days. It's about the look, the profile, I don't know. Whatever else. But then I want to think that the people that write the music, the people that write the scripts for all these great movies should get more credit than the actors. The directors are much more talented than the actors and actresses, in my opinion. Well, and that depends. Anyway...moving on.

You ever wonder about the people who got stuck with jobs like cardboard box production? I feel bad for those people. It's like, I consider them to all have such great potential. Or atleast I hope they do... And then you think, "well if no one made cardboard boxes, we'd run out of them." Where would we be without cardboard boxes? And it's not all about cardboard. What about toothbrush production? Toothpicks? Tires? All the sticker labels that go on everything? Street signs? Anything that we take for granted, you know? Who makes all that? Garbage cans. Paper and pencils. CD cases. Lightbulbs.
And then there's packaging peanuts! Oh boy...

Although...we all know where all that stuff is made: China, Japan, and Taiwan.

Do you ever think that they think Americans are crazy for half the stuff we get produced over there? What do you think they all thought the first time they saw "Spongebob Squarepants" coming down the production line? lol I dont know. I think about stuff like that.

And then you start thinking about all the labor done by like children and stuff, and it makes you really sad. :-( I wont talk about that though. Too sad.

But back to what I was saying earlier, what if all those people just decided they didn't want to make lightbulbs anymore? What if someone said, "I'm done working at the tic-tac factory!" And all the people who make the machinery for factories that make the cardboard boxes. What if they stopped making it? Stopped designing it? Fixing it at all? I know my points aren't very valid. I'm just thinking abstractly and randomly. So take it with a grain of salt that I'm extremely bored, and tired.

I'm gonna take a nap now. I hope you liked my "points" if I had any. haha

This made me laugh

Snow day?

I got off school today for the "snow" - doesn't look like much of anything, but I guess there's more coming.

I'm sick of the snow now though. I generally love it. Winter's great. But I don't want any more winter right now. Bring on the SPRING time would ya?

Goals before I die

I've had this in a few other locations prior to this one, but it never hurts for me to refresh my memory. Plus it kind of puts me into perspective. I added and changed a few also. I omitted all the ones that I'd rather keep to myself. lol Maybe you'll find out what those are, and maybe you can just imagine what they are. Here we go:

1. See Jimmy Eat World in concert
2. See John Mayer in concert
3. See Say Anything in concert
4. Learn how to ski
5. Go to Europe
6. Eat french fries and french dressing and french toast in one sitting in France
7. Go to the top of the Eiffel Tower.
8. Design a purse that starts a craze and make millions
9. Have someone write a song about me. Good or bad. Id be flattered. I would prefer something good though...
10. Make a CD. Atleast finish one.
11. Perform in front of over 1000 people
12. Ride on a motorcycle. However long or short the ride. I've never been on one.
13. Kiss someone at the top of a ferris wheel
14. Make out in the rain
15. Stand at that one place in the US where you're in like 4 states at the same time.
16. See the sun rise in DE and set in CA (that'll be hard, but I want to do it)
17. Write a book or short story
18. Have one of my works published, or put in an exhibit or something.
19. Fall in love.
20. Buy a house
21. Drive a convertible
22. Be successful - whatever that comes to mean
23. Own a business (small scale)
24. Find out how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop
25. Figure out the trick to the rubix cube.
26. Drive somewhere without any destination
27. Hear something I've written on the radio. Even if its not me singing it.
28. Read all the books on my list of books to read
29. Buy all the CDs on my list of CDs to buy (impossible unless money was no object)
30. Learn how to play the guitar - I keep giving up :-P
31. Go to the beach in the middle of the night just to see the sunrise. I've never been able to just go do that. Maybe when I don't live here anymore. lol
32. Inspire someone
33. Eat sushi
34. Get a tatoo
35. Design/make my wedding dress
36. Get married :-P
37. Witness a miracle
38. Figure out how CDs and records work
39. Sleep on the beach
40. See Pluto in a telescope
41. Road trip
42. Meet a perfect stranger
43. Be a waitress somewhere (wouldn't matter how long or where, I've just always wanted to have that job for some reason)
44. Be perfectly happy with myself
45. Crowd surf
46. Win the lottery
47. Go to Vegas
48. Go to CA
49. Visit that really big mall in Canada
50. Go sky diving

I'll add more or remove ones I do as I think of them/accomplish them. But that'll be all for now.

The Track Record

I went and saw the Track Record at Fletchers last night. They're always really good live. I've only seen them one other time, and we were actually late to that one. lol But I really like their sound. The music is always jumping around and it sounds really unique. The breaks, the changes, the hooks, the lyrics, the progressions, the builds, everything. It's all really really good. In my opinion anyway.

I actually wished that they would have played more from their EP. Their debut album "The Coolest Kind of Crazy" is very similar to the sound of the EP but I definitely think that the EP has more conviction to it. More of a message. Where the album seems more "written to be written" if that makes sense of any kind. I love their music though. It's very active. Lively. Makes you want to dance. lol

My favorite song on the album is "Available/Responsible" - so I was happy that they played that one. But I really did want to hear "Letters to Summer." That's a great song off of their EP.

But other than that, it was a really good show, and a fun night. :-)

English vs. Math

I had a debate with a classmate the other day about the importance of English vs the importance of Math in the world. Her opinion was that math was more important than language and english, and mine was that english and literatrue, and writing were more important than math.

After going back and forth with various points, the argument ended with one statement that I made:

"You know...math is a language."

Faith

I recently had a very interesting conversation the other day about faith, religion, and the question, "why do you believe in God?" I really enjoy conversing on this type of thing because it really gets me thinking. It motivates me to question my personal motives on why I myself am a Christian.

I'll start with the key concept of the idea: An accidental universe

I find it really hard to look at the structure of the world that we're living in, the way everything is a heiarchy, and the way everything is perfected in a systemic order or sequence of events that lead to one sole destination, and the way that everything runs itself in the world in terms of nature, science, life, etc, and believe that it was all some accidental series of chain reactions and explosions, and whatever else that evolved into the world as we know it today. I mean think about it. I read an article about the perfection of Earth, and how it's design is correspondent to the presence of life on it:

"The Earth's size and corresponding gravity holds a thin layer of mostly nitrogen and oxygen gases, only extending about 50 miles above the Earth's surface. If Earth were smaller, an atmosphere would be impossible, like the planet Mercury. If Earth were larger, its atmosphere would contain free hydrogen, like Jupiter. Earth is the only known planet equipped with an atmosphere of the right mixture of gases to sustain plant, animal and human life."

I also read another interesting point in the same article on the idea that explosions of specific gases that came together formed the Earth:

"The alternative to God existing is that all that exists around us came about by natural cause and random chance. If someone is rolling dice, the odds of rolling a pair of sixes is one thing. But the odds of spots appearing on blank dice is something else. What Pasteur attempted to prove centuries ago, science confirms, that life cannot arise from non-life. Where did human, animal, plant life come from?"

In all honesty, I think it would be a lot harder to not believe in God, you know? You're basically accepting the fact that if there is a "hell" that you're going to it. I personally like the idea that if I am in fact "wrong" that it won't matter either way. I'd rather be safe than in a lake of fire, wouldn't you? That's not to scare anyone off either. It's just to present the reality of that situation. Atheism is a "religion" because your belief in nothing is...a belief, as ambiguous as that may sound...

Then people talk about how "Well if God is so loving, then why do people suffer? Why do people get murdered?" etc etc etc. Well truth be told... if nothing bad ever happened in the world, if there weren't any crime, or suffering, or pain of any kind, there would be absolutely no reason to believe in God at all. Think about that one. Because then we wouldn't need a law. We wouldn't need a government. We wouldn't have sin. But the fact is, we all live in sin. It's inevitable. So if there weren't a God, there'd be no sin? What? That seems pretty impossible. Because it is. I'm basically saying that if there were no "higher being" there'd be no life in the first place.

Another thing about religion, is that without it our society would be extremely corrupt. When Abraham Lincoln founded this country, and those with him, they based it on Christian principles of moral, and faith, etc. If they didn't base our country on these principles, I bet everyone in the US would be a democrat. No, I'm joking. I don't have a specific oriented political view besides being an "independent."

I'm kind of jumping around here a bit, but when I think about it, I think that I don't want to be an "accident." I don't want to be a subject of evolutionary change. That means that I'm only here to live, pay taxes, and die. How degrading is that? I like knowing that I'm here for something. Anything.

Sometimes I'm a little skeptic about having to "live my life for God." That sounds really selfish. I know. But I'm sure everyone thinks like that. They don't want to have to sacrifice anything for anyone but themselves. That isn't true, of course. But we live in a selfish world full of selfish people. So that said, I'm selfish. But I guess it's hard to be selfish when you know if it weren't for God there'd be nothing to live for at all, right? Okay so I don't know everything there is to know, but I do have faith. That's something.

There are things that I have to think about and wonder though. Like how people come to appreciate things like beauty in nature, beauty in anything. In anyone. You know? Like, that is something that we all come to percieve in our own lives, but there are things that everyone can agree on. And was that an accident? Did we all just happen to like "nice smells" and have some kind of awe for nature and the diversity within it as well as it's beauty? Was that something that came about by chance? Doubtful.

Here's a quote from another article I read:

"Choosing to believe that God exists is a voluntary act of trust. We believe not because we think the reality of God is absolutely unequivocal, but because we judge the evidence to be greatly in its favor. After careful thought, faith puts its trust and confidence in a premise that is seen to be supported by the weight of the evidence. Faced with the ultimate fork in the road, faith understands that a decision must be made, and it responsibly chooses one alternative."

I'm not a "Jesus-freak" or someone who's gonna come knocking at your door or beating you over the head with a Bible saying "YOU NEED JESUS IN YOUR LIFE!!!" But I am someone who lives in faith. I believe in God. I believe that the world wasn't an accident, and I believe that there is some divine purpose to the universe and it's existence. So that said, I have faith, and thought I'd elaborate on why exactly I have it. In many ways, I can't answer that question. But that's understandable, isn't it? Nobody knows everything. Everyone has doubts about something or other in their life. But yeah. I have faith.

"For since the creation of the world God's invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse." - Romans 1:20

Basically saying there's no reason to not believe in God. :-P But there's my take on it.

I'm not here to judge. That's what God is for. ;-)

Newsboys Concert

So last night I went to the First Mariner Arena to see the Newsboys in concert there. It was long, cold, tiresome, and a little boring at some times. But I did enjoy myself. Mostly the conversation.

The two bands before them were kind of poser-ish. Adam and I had fun discussing them after each set. The first band that went on we decided "couldn't decide on what to paint the baby room because they didn't know the gender." They had baby blue electric guitars, a hot pink drum set lined with pink furr, and one of them had a checkered flying V guitar that made your eyes hurt to look at. They sounded like a desperate cross between Cartel and Blink 182. After mentioning that to Adam, about 10 seconds later they used the lyric "a day late, a buck short." Laughter. :-)

The second band was better. They had one guitar that costed more than the entire previous band's set. Found that funny as well.

I don't know why bands insist on the audience jumping sometimes. That's stupid. Every song they were like "We want you to go CRAZY!" and it would be a ballad or something. So I kept on turning over and making crazy movements just to emphasize the hilarity of the fact that they wanted us to "go crazy."

"Where's my straight jacket?!?!?!"

Anyway... the headliners, "Newsboys," are this Australian christian-rock group. They were really good. Not the greatest, but atleast by the end of it I wasn't disappointed in going at all.

Overall a fun night. Not nearly as fun as the Ataris, but there were definitely quotes to remember from that. I'll leave it at the best one:

"That could have been epic...but it wasn't."

The Ataris Concert!!!

Here are some photos from the Ataris concert that i went to last night. :-D

Say Anything

Older movie starring John Cusack (However you spell his last name) - but it's another one that is is in my top list of movies. Very real, very infectious, and it was so cute! I loved it!

I bought that one the other day as well. I'll have to have some kind of movie night - not sure if it would just be a bunch of girls, or what. But that would be awesome to just watch all these really great movies. Plus I'd probably cry a lot less when more people were there. haha

This movie is being added to my top list of movies for sure though. It's awesome. I would totally date a guy like Lloyd any day. :-)

Somewhere in Time

A 1980s movie starring Christopher Reeve. Classic. It's probably my favorite movie of all time. Brilliant. You gotta go watch it. A little sappy, but I'm into that kind of thing. Especially when it's so convincing. Unlike today. Romance films have totally bombed from what they used to be, which is why I really really enjoy this one. It's so different. Copies have been made, and similar movies produced, but not like this one.

That said, I think you should find someone to watch it with, and I will too. I finally found a copy at Best Buy the other day! Everywhere else Ive looked didn't have it, but I finally got it yesterday. So i'm happy. Waiting to watch it though. It's sooo good. And it'll be worth the wait. ;-)

Iiiiiiiit's Fridayyyyyy!!!!!!

Oh what a glorious feeling. School lets out, you walk outside, the cool breeze goes past your ears and whispers, "Freedom!" over and over again in your ears.

I do work tonight, so that isn't the greatest way to spend a Friday evening, but it only builds up the anticipation that I'm feeling for tomorrow night: that being the ATARIS CONCERT IN DC!!! WOOO!!! Wow am I excited about that.

The day after that Im going to a Newsboys concert. They're an Australlian christian rock band, and normally I'm not into that type of thing. I'm a Christian, but it's not really my scene in music. Anyway, this band is pretty good, and I'm looking forward to that one as well. But you can guarantee I won't be screaming at that one nearly as loud as I will be when I see THE ATARIS IN DC!!!!! WOOOO!!!!! haha can't get enough of them.

Hope you all have a good weekend! Mine's gonna be amazing. :-)

Ohhh life

Lovin it. Things are kind of complicated, and some things are kind of "vague" right now, but honestly, I'm really really happy with the way things are going.

Emotions are kind of crazy, but I like it. I don't know where everything is going, but I like the feeling right now. I feel so relaxed just knowing, "you know what? it's all gonna be okay."

So yeah. I'm happy.

I've also been extremely imaginitive and contemplative lately. In just about anything you can think of. Like, creatively, physically, sensually, emotionally, everything. I kind of get lost in thought just considering possibilities. For my future, for an hour from now, for a week from now, etc. I just like to think. Sometimes I do get carried away. Like with the sensual ones. Haha But that all just makes me happy again.

So life... life is good. Friends, friends are awesome. And right now, I'm really really happy. :-)

Spring Break

Break? What?!!??! I never get one of those...

But seriously, spring break is fast approaching and I couldn't be more excited about it. Hopefully I'll get out and do something - might go to the beach, hang out with friends I hardly see anymore, whatever. I don't want to make a plan though. It needs to be sponatneous. Otherwise it won't be as fun. :-D

I'm looking forward to it. Extremely. I might even write a song or two. ;-)

Hopefully I won't work too much, but give me a call! I'd love to hear from you and/or hang out this Spring Break!!!!