VT

This morning, a man shot and killed about 30 people at Virginia Tech. The event occured 4 days before the anniversary of the Colombine Shootings. So sad... I remember going to some kind of conference thing where the father of one of the victims spoke. Brought me and many others to tears. But just thinking about the affect that this has on people, locally, nationally, globally, it's pretty mind boggling. You wonder if the guy behind it all is sitting in his grave laughing his head off thinking, "Yeah...I did that."

I'm really not sure what kind of mindset you'd have to be in to want to kill that many people, think there was no point in life, and then to just kill yourself afterward. I'd kill myself out of disgust. "Oh my god, what am I thinking? I don't deserve to live after this!" Then again, I would have to be totally possessed to do it in the first place. That said, I'd never do something like that. Let alone think to. It's pretty insane. So I guess that's what you'd have to be: insane!

Anyway... I think about what I'd do in a situation like that. I'd probably just freeze in shock and wonder, "wow someone's actually doing this." Or I'd scream my head off and get the hell out of there. I don't know... It seems so abnormal. So illogical. Just because I'm not used to it and can't imagine it ever actually happening to "me." You hear it all in the news, and on TV, and you're like, "What if that EVER happened here?" and then 2 seconds later you're like, "Nah...not possible." But it's like, it IS possible. And it's scary. Scary to think anybody would have the nerve to take fate into their own hands and be so selfish as to just take the lives of people they don't even know.

The other thing I hate, is thinking about how "30 were killed." You think about that number: 30. It doesn't seem tragic. You know why? It's because we're so used to headlines that say "Over 1,000 killed" or "10,000" or "100,000" if it's a war. And those numbers look tragic. So 30 gets kind of side shelved. I hate that. I think one person dead could be tragic. If I lost anyone close to me, friend, relative, whatever, I'd be so out of sorts. You think about one person close to you dying, and it's almost the end of the world. Well now think about 30 families. 30 moms or dads who have to find out that their son or daughter died. Their son or daughter got shot. Your best friend, your sister, your brother, your neighbor, anybody. Death is so much bigger than any of us really take it for. We play all these video games that make it look like a waste of time, or some kind of accomplishment. I don't know... Death is a natural thing, but not when it's murder. To take the life of another human being is to be a traitor to your own being. So yeah, I get pretty upset hearing stuff like this. Not because I relate, but because I feel sympathetic. I consider all the aspects of that kind of thing, and relate it to here and now. Virginia isn't that far from here.

It makes me appreciate everyone around me. My friends, my family, everybody. You're just thankful to be alive. For a person who's always thinking in worst case scenario, these events just fuel the fire. That said, I think everyone should take note of everything that happened this morning, and maybe reflect it on themselves. Just be thankful.